An elusive millionaire built a mysterious hotel on the Mornington Peninsula that I've always wanted to stay at. So when the prospect of becoming an in-house writer across their suite of brands came up, you can only imagine my efforts.

After a couple of interviews, the final hiring stage was a writing task to create and name a $20k getaway package -- plus -- pen the press release, GM quotes, package inclusions, website description, and social captions. (Among other tasks for their other brands...)

Sadly, I didn't get the gig. Still, it all makes for another character-building story, in that their feedback was, "you're truly a first-rate writer, but we've decided to hire an Art Director".

You can't write this shit. But yet again, I have.

BUT OF THE 17- PAGE SUBMISSION, THIS WAS MY FAVOURITE.